“I’ve got two daughters who will have to make their way in this skinny-obsessed world, and it worries me, because I don’t want them to be empty-headed, self-obsessed, emaciated clones; I’d rather they were independent, interesting, idealistic, kind, opinionated, original, funny – a thousand things, before ‘thin’. And frankly, I’d rather they didn’t give a gust of stinking chihuahua flatulence whether the woman standing next to them has fleshier knees than they do.” J.K. Rowling
I read this amazing quote a few weeks ago, and it has changed my way of thinking DRASTICALLY. During this time of New Year’s resolutions focusing so heavily on looking a certain way or being a certain size, I think this quote is timely and so important.
I am very guilty of comparing myself to others, of looking to see whose knees are “fleshier,” of obsessing over calorie counts and the scale and dress sizes. And I can’t get that time back. I can’t change the past or give myself back the hours I lost feeling bad about myself for not looking a certain way, but I can change what happens in the future.
I want to spend this year focusing on being “a thousand things before ‘thin.'” I want to put my focus and energy into things that make me smarter, wiser, kinder, more loving…there are so many more important things in life than what size I wear or what the scale says!
Making wise choices with food and making time for exercise is absolutely important–don’t get me wrong–but it needs to be done in the name of being strong, healthy and taking care of yourself rather than the pursuit of an unrealistic body type.
My mom did a FABULOUS job with teaching me the value of inner beauty over outer beauty, but despite all of the wisdom she shared with me, I have still struggled immensely with accepting my body the way it is. It was hard in my college and pre-kid days, and now that I’ve endured carrying and breast-feeding twins and the physical changes that occur as a result, it’s a thousand times harder than ever.
But when I think about my daughters and what kind of example I’m setting for them and how I want them to love themselves and focus on their inner beauty, it isn’t as hard as it used to be. Does having kids make us that much wiser? Or just offer a new perspective and filter with which we see ourselves?
Whatever it is, I pledge in 2014 to work on becoming smarter, kinder, friendlier, more of a servant to my family and friends, building a stronger relationship with God and the people in my life…and to keep “skinny” and “fat” out of my inner and outer vocabulary.
How do you deal with body image for yourself and for your children? What are you planning on focusing on in 2014?