Embracing Your Mom Body

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Before and after photos typically celebrate major weight loss, dramatic plastic surgery or some starlet who has returned to looking fabulous after having kids.

What if a before and after picture was designed to celebrate a return to a “mom” body? This picture of Australian mom of three Taryn Brumfitt below set off a social media firestorm a few months ago for breaking the mold and embracing body:

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After training for and competing in a bikini body contest, Brumfitt realized having a “perfect” body left her emotionally and spiritually unhealthy at the end of the competition. She decided to return back to her balanced lifestyle of moderate exercise, occasional treats and typical “mom” life. After many tears and making plans to have a tummy tuck and breast augmentation, she had a breakthrough.

Brumfitt felt a strong conviction that teaching her daughter to have a healthy body image could only be accomplished through learning to love her own body as a mom with all of its bumps, lumps and wrinkles. She is now on a mission to educate women everywhere by filming a documentary (which will be funded through a Kickstarter campaign) about the root of widespread body image issues and how freeing it can be to embrace your body just the way it is. This quote from a video clip on Huff Post Women captures the heart of her movement:

“I want women to stop striving for it [the perfect body]. I want women to start focusing more on their accomplishments [and] how they contribute to the world. If women can remove this chip, this body shaming and hating chip, get it out of their head…it allows them to contribute more, and that’s what it’s all about.”

As a mom of twins who hates swimsuit shopping and has researched and seriously considered a tummy tuck to repair my stretched out and saggy middle, this movement is a breath of fresh air to a weary soul.

I have cried too many tears over clothes which didn’t fit the way they used to, and I wish I had saved those tears for a conversation with a friend who was going through a hard time.

I have spent too many hours reading books about abdominal exercises and tummy tucks after someone once again told me I looked pregnant, and I wish I could have spent those hours laughing with my family in the backyard.

I have made too many nasty comments to my reflection in the mirror, and I wish I could have used those words to encourage a fellow mom.

I am done wasting my time in the quest for the perfect body. I’m going to learn to love this body not only for my sake but as an example for my daughters, and I am pouring my energy into things which are more important in life.

I challenge you to join me in sharing Taryn’s story and the Body Image Movement. We deserve it, and our daughters absolutely deserve it. #Ihaveembraced

This article was published on the Greeley Moms website here. Check out Greeley Moms today!

 

 

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The Perpetual Search for Perfect Swimwear

Swimsuit shopping with my new “mom” body has been quite a nightmare…can you relate? Here’s this week’s post for the Greeley Moms:

http://www.greeleytribune.com/news/feature3/11513152-113/mom-swimwear-swimsuit-moms

What do you think? Have you had a similar experience? Thanks for reading and sharing!

Worst Mother’s Day Ever? Let it Go!

Mother’s Day has come and gone yet again, and I am shocked at how a Hallmark holiday can wreak havoc on the emotions of women everywhere.

For some of you, this Mother’s Day may have been the best day ever. Maybe your family spoiled you from the moment you woke up until your head hit the pillow at night, showering you with love and gifts.

For others, maybe Mother’s Day was a huge disappointment. The one gift you wanted was forgotten, your family was distracted and you ended the day feeling frustrated and unappreciated.

For the rest of us, it was probably a nice day. The kids did something to make you feel special, and the world continued as normal with dishes, laundry and maybe even getting showered with vomit while you cuddled a sick child who loves you so dearly.

No matter how your Mother’s Day turned out, it’s over. Let it go. Say your thanks, make your peace and don’t let yourself get caught up in whining, complaining, husband-bashing and pouting which seems to be wide-spread following Mother’s Day.

I have a theory related to as to why so many of us end up feeling disappointed as the sun sets on Mother’s Day. As women, we tend to pride ourselves on planning activities and gifts for other people. We spend hours on Pinterest to find the perfect handmade craft for a friend or a spouse, and we have grand plans for celebrating every holiday from children’s birthdays to National Ice Cream Day and every holiday in between. When someone else, namely a husband, doesn’t put the same time and energy into planning our special day, it’s easy to be frustrated.

The second part of my post-Mother’s Day-pouting theory is also related to social media. It’s easy for us as moms to get wrapped up in the viral videos about having the world’s toughest job and to make ourselves out to be martyrs for carrying babies, giving birth and for all of the work which comes along with mothering children. These are all noble tasks, but they don’t entitle us to anything more than the love and respect of our families.

So forget Pinterest, forget playing the martyr card and look back on your Mother’s Day with some perspective. Life with kids hardly ever goes as planned, and Mother’s Day likely wasn’t exactly as you had planned or imagined, either. (One of my kids was sick. She literally soaked me in vomit. Soaked. Someone clearly forgot to tell her that Mother’s Day was supposed to be my day off.)

Have a little grace. The holiday is highly commercialized, and we shouldn’t let one measly little 24-hour period dictate how loved we feel by our families. We also shouldn’t use it as an excuse for bad behavior.

So whether you were spoiled or frustrated on Sunday, do what mothers do best: bust into a rendition of “Let It Go,” wash the vomit off of your favorite sweater, be thankful for your kids and family and consider dropping better hints for next year.

This post originally appeared on the Greeley Moms’ page last week, and I forgot to share it when it was more timely and relevant. Here is the link to the original posting: http://www.greeleytribune.com/news/feature3/11420024-113/kids-family-frustrated-holiday.

The Beauty We Can Teach

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Thank you to Lupita Nyong’o for reminding us of the importance of inner beauty. As parents, we have a huge responsibility to teach our children how to be beautiful where it matters the most. Here’s the link to this week’s Greeley Moms blog. Thanks for reading sharing if you choose!

http://www.greeleytribune.com/news/feature3/11240941-113/beauty-inner-daughters-lupita